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Steven Yellin

OK, my calling is to beat Rafael Nadal on clay and Roger Federer on grass. That way, I can win the French Open tennis championships and Wimbledon in the same year. Not many tennis players have done this. There is one small problem---I lack the talent. (But of course not the desire.) Is this a legitimate calling??

Fred Gratzon

How do you know your calling is to beat Federer and Nadal?

It doesn't sound like a calling to me. It is more like a silly fantasy.

On the other hand, tennis (or sports in general) may definitely be your calling even if you don't have the talent to win a major championship yourself. You may be able to realize this dream and also fulfil your calling by teaching your secrets of winning to someone who does have the talent but needs that extra something.

Callings are about giving to others.


Good guideline, and may well be true - with caveats. That is, even after thinking for a while, I could not come up with anything I have to give, the giving of which would fill me with happiness.

I've got an easy, unstressful job in the only area I can imagine ever being employed without losing my mind (computers). I don't hate the job by any means, but I have no passion for it. Resultingly, I feel unfulfilled. It feels like the 8-hour days are 8-hour segments of precious life forever wasted, instead of being 8-hour segments towards something worthwhile.

I've got dreams of entrepreneurship, dreams of increased freedom, but they are unrealistic - thinking harder usually just reveals that I don't know what I would actually like to do as an entrepreneur, either. I've got a passion for laziness, but that in itself doesn't bring bread to the table (except for you, Fred ;-)).

What's your take on people like me, people with nothing much to give? Would you agree that some people are just doomed to menial jobs for life, simply *unable* to find a calling?

Fred Gratzon

You have an enormous amount to give. You must give that which was given to you. So spend a little time making a list of those gifts. They don't necessarily have to fit any societally defined category. Just make a list of those things, qualities, characteristics, talents, abilities, skills, insights, etc. that make you an exceptional and unique person.

These were gifts to you. Now give them to others.

For example, if you are a "gifted" musician. Give your music to others.

As for finding an area in which to be an entrepreneur, make another list of your passions. Then think of something where several of those passions and gifts intersect. Therein lies a path to entrepreneurial success.

Time is too precious. It should not be wasted on stuff you don't love doing.

Alexander Kjerulf

Here’s my definition of your calling: Something so important to you, that you would rather do it and fail, than not do it.

If your calling to tennis is that great Steven, go right ahead and play :o)

Fred Gratzon

Steven is just pulling my chain. Not only do I know him and count him as one of my best friends, but we are also collaborating on a book together on sports, so I have inside information about where he is coming from.

My guess is Steven is around 50. You, however, will not see someone so comfortable in his body. He is a gifted athlete. He was the Florida High School singles champion in 1971, the same year the Chris Evert was the girls' champion. And even today he regularly thrashes all the young upstarts in tennis. (When he plays, he is sooooo relaxed, it looks like he could fall asleep in the middle of a match. Yet he is always in the right place at the right time, effortlessly swatting the ball, and causing his poor opponent to run hither and yon and sweat torrents. Steve looks as fresh after a match as before.)

Steve's approach to tennis (and all sport for that matter) shifts the paradigm on how athletics will be taught, practiced and competed. He has an awesome insight into motion and its source. Writing our book together is a major joy and fulfillment in my life.

I was not kidding when I said that Steve's knowledge of how to perform in sports would give a talented player the necessary edge to beat Nadal on clay and Federer on grass. And no coach has EVER taught it before.

Andy Roddick, are you listening?


I enjoyed reading your blog and the answers you give to some of the commenters.

I just printed out a copy of Chapter 3 of the book. I'll probably be back to buy (unless it's your calling to give me one ;) ) the whole book. Looks like a good read.


Wes Hopper

I'm glad to see someone else writing about the critical importance of purpose, or calling, in life. I've been teaching goals workshops for about 5 years, first with Bob Proctor and now on my own, and it took me a while to realize that the reason most people had trouble with goals is that they did NOT know their purpose in life and therefore their motivation was low. Fred, you're absolutely correct - everyone has a calling! And it's always about what you have to give, not what you want to take. It took me 50 years to find mine because it was buried under all that "good advice" I got as a kid.
Here's a clue - often your calling looks unrealistic and impractical. Your mind will tell you that you are crazy to think about it, you are unqualified to pursue it and, best of all, you'll never make any money at it. If that's what you hear in your mind, you're on the right track!
I did a couple of recent articles on purpose in my newsletter which are archived on my web site, CreateSuccesSeminars.com
Thanks, Fred, for writing about this!

Lise SF from Australia

Hi Fred & Kindred Spirits, I really resonated with this post as its sort of lifted the lid on my own questions. I know I'm here for a reason, I guess its got convoluted from life experience up to now. I have mixed it in with a career coz I guess up until recent times most of us worked more than anything else so therefore we would like for our calling to be our career. Now life is changing rapidly and people are having fun working and working less than they used to. Actually work is transforming into fun. Work used to be a four letter word for me. Reading your book was like the sun shining in my window, you said what I felt and what I'd wanted to hear. Thing is, my passion is travel, so how do I move from resistance to seeing there is a way I make this my calling? Warmest, Lisa :^)


Yes, figuring out where to start and what path to follow seems to be the hardest part of all.

Fred, did you know that you enjoyed making ice cream and bringing people together, etc. and did you make a list of gifts/talents or did you just kind of fall into something you loved to do? WIth Telecom, for example, you said you began that path out of financial desparation?

Would love to hear your thoughts.

Steve in Sunny FLa.

Phyllis Bowens

I believe that my calling is to help others create an environment that is uniquely their own in a aesthetic way. For a number of years, I worked at the county. At the time, I thought that landing a county job was the best thing that I could do to help others and provide a living. It turned out to be the biggest nightmare of my life. It affected my physical body and my emotional state. After nearly 5 yrs (at the hell hole- as I named it) I decided to return to school. Now, I'm a full-time student, pursuing my passion (interior design). The migraines are gone! I feel like I'm in the right place.


I love reading this blog. At least i find that I am not alone. I do not know what my calling is, and am stuck in a job I do not love though I am self employed I call it a job. It is a chore coming to open my shop every day. How can I find my calling and stop working and start making money when having fun?
Fred, could it be your calling to help me? I have read a good number of your articles and I think they are FAB, but can I really be lazy and put bread on the table, no kidding? I love dancing but am already 32 and have a family to take care of, so I dont have the luxury of just dancing life away!
Lillian, Kenya


An easy way to find one's calling - if you're open to astrology - is to look for the location of your moon's north node (also known as the dragon's head.) The house position and sign will direct you to your soul's purpose, which, when you are actively engaged in it, will help everything fall into place.

Reginald Sinevet

I have a passion to help people who are in foreclosure and am a certified probate specialist. I'm able to help people who are in probate. I believe that's my calling because I want do it so bad.

My thing is I don't have the money to do marketing to get a hold of the people in foreclosure. I'm looking for private money or to connect with people who know of such people.

I have the desire and knowledge to this, but need some assistance. Can anyone help?

Max Leibman

Fred: Great post, and great advice in the blogging and the comments here. I would say that you don't truly own anything you can't give away--and that includes talents. Definitionally, one can't make a contribution for one's own sake.

Alexander: Love it! That's about as succinctly perfect a definition of calling as I've ever seen.

rebecca shacn

I think that the issue talked about on this page is extremely important. I am a 25 year old young woman in the process of deciding what I feel that my path is in life. I find myself surrounded by bizarre beliefs about life from my parents and others. These beliefs have to do with thinking that life is supposed to be 'hard' and that you're supposed to do something that impresses others and makes you seem like you're in control. So, I look at the end result of living in such a way, and I see that it usually leads to a lack of connection with oneself and those around them. This lacking connection leads to a lack of zest for life and the inability to be passionate about much of anything. It seems to me that living in this way leads to forgetting how to live at all. And, you may have the money, but what good is it if you don't even know what you really like, or what you actually want to do with that money? Losing the passion that is what makes life worth living for in order to have money so that you can live--seems like throwing out the lemonade so that you can have a refreshing beverage? I believe that we need to change the advertising industry, and this countries obsession with appearances. We need to take the power back to the individual and help people to realize that they possess more power than anyone else does in creating a good life for themselves.And, teach our children that there's more to life than looks and fame--life is about realizing oneself and maintaining the ability to feel.

Kamran K.Kureshi

Is there some sort of an age when the 'Calling Card' could work most effectively? --- I guess, somewhere around 40. Calling may not be reccommended below
30 except in very obvious cases e.g. people
born with a talent and are wanting and able to persue it.... Giving means less until the worth of what is being given is known,
alas, a constraint of age....

William Hirsh

This is the issue i have the hardest time with is deciding purpose. I have Jack Canfield's "The Success Principles," and I got stuck at principle 8 out of 64 about creating goals because my vision and purpose is a little disoriented. I have always wanted to give the world a better understanding of its self, but there are millions if not a infinite number of ways one can do that. First, it started with math, but that lead to the fact no one can understand math. Next it lead to possibility of being a bontanist because all of life can be reflected from plant behavior and survival. That was short lived by the fact that I have a hard time being outside. Now, I am in a physics coruse where I am walking away with knowledge unlike other coruses I have taken. Trouble is physics is a field that people can understand, but it gets harder the math at some points. I love art, I love some sciences, I love to communicate with people to find a solution. I love learning a large body of knowledge (that I can retain!) I do not have the 200 IQ to acomplish all of this in one life time, and making a descision is almost impossible for me. I would love some suggestions to narrow down my focus maybe because being a ture modern day polymath (a man of encyclopedic learning) is close to impossible for someone with a 300 IQ much less me with a 109 IQ, and a brain that does not like to retain information.


I realized how old the comments were, but I hope that maybe there is someone who can offer me some guidance. I am 28 years old and I feel like I am stuck in a career that I loathe, granted I know this is not really the case. I feel like I am about to bust, I cannot describe the feeling. It's as if I know my calling, its as if I keep blocking it and shutting it down, because I see no way of accomplishing it now. I feel like I am loosing my mind. Someone please help me.


my strengths are generally all creative and here are the ones that i care deeply about or run thick through me:

highly aware of my world
insight into peoples hearts and minds
carefulness in communications
problem solver
mind maper
progressive minded
quality experience oriented
fire for change
i also know photography and graphic design but neither are a calling in my opinion.

what i want out of life is to enjoy it. i want to use my gifts to help people through their lives, but i have a huge problem with the emphasis society places on a one track college education and i want deeply to succeed without obtaining a degree (i hold an AA from the past, but don't want to attend further establishments as i am anti-establishment). even if just to prove to people that they are in charge of their own destiny (and no company is).

i feel that i have great things to accomplish, but it's difficult to narrow my focus and come up with a way to succeed through life in my own way while obtaining enough money to live (frugally).

i would like to write books, but am not sure if it's exactly right for me or not. nor do i have a clue about how to go about it (although i am currently writing a long piece on a specific topic).

someone pointed out to me that i am good at helping people (and myself) navigate the path of ones inner life.

i'm in a huge hurry to get this written before i have to to rush off to my coffee shop job. so i'm sorry if there are errors or if any of this is unclear... but i would GREATLY APPRECIATE your HELP!!

thank you!!!

Jack's Customized Fat Loss

finding one's calling is like finding yourself. once you get to know more about yourself the more close you are to meeting your calling

- Jack Leak

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